April 7, 2022, 6:54 a.m.

4/6/2022

You Can’t Even Step Into the Same River Once

10:31 am. Woken by K. shouting in her sleep. She has nightmares pretty much every night.

Thought of a title I kind of liked for K.’s podcast idea: “Failing to be Spiritual with Caveh Zahedi.”

1:18 pm. Today was AJ’s last day as my research assistant. He said he was having separation anxiety and wanted to find a way to keep helping out. I was touched. He asked me to come to the graduation ceremony so I could meet his parents. My first instinct was to say no but I probably should.

4:07 pm. Introduced K. and Val on Zoom. K. didn’t realize until afterwards that Val and I had been involved a year and a half ago, and was annoyed with me. I thought she knew, but I guess not. It took her about 5 minutes to get over it, but then she seemed fine.

5:35 pm. Observing Arnold’s class. Very different style than mine. I would push the students much harder. But he is more respectful and accepting in a lot of ways. More patient also. Less easily bored maybe.

6:13 pm. Bored to death. I want to scream. I hate these observations. These students are unbearably self-absorbed and clueless about others.

6:57 pm. It's Maxwell's birthday today. He turned 33.

I told him the new podcast idea, which he liked, but he doesn’t like the title: “Failing to be Spiritual with Caveh Zahedi.”

11:31 pm. K.’s feeling suicidal again. I’m really worried about her.

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